Tag Archives: awkward hobbies

Wait…This exists?

There are some things that I know, that I never asked to know and sometimes wish I could un-know. But thanks to the internets, I know them. Bizarre information on the Internet is like a burning building you can’t look away from or a really trashy Facebook friend who you can’t bring yourself unfollow.

flames

Maybe people were genuinely more normal before the Internet and camera phones brought a venue for people to fly their freak flags and awkward people who hate leaving the house (Like meeeeeee) to sit back , pop popcorn, and watch the oddities.

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Or maybe people who really enjoyed placing a piece of bread around a cat and laughing about it have existed for centuries, if not millennia! Because really, do we know why the ancient Egyptians were so into cats?

anientkitty

I like cats too. Cat’s get me. I am glad there are so many on this cast web of (cat related) information.

So. Here are a few of my favorite WTF websites:

1. Cats that look like hitler

http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/

This one is a classic. Who doesn’t want to look over pictures of felines resembling one of the most evil human beings to ever live? Fun fact: my friend has a kitler.

2. Obsessive fan site for the hidden bathroom at disneyland.

http://www.secretrestroom.com/

The person/people who made this website are amazingly devoted to this bathroom. There are separate pages for things such as “vent”. Is this normal? Or healthy? Almost certainly not. But this… Is a thing.

3. OMG Cats in space!

http://omgcatsinspace.tumblr.com/

Exactly what it sounds like

4.How many goats are you worth?

http://www.howmanygoats.com/

In case you were wondering. Ya know… I have never once thought of trading someone in for goats before, but now that I know, I’m gonna have my husband take this test. Just for future reference…

So yeah. If you wanted to lose several minutes, if not hours thinking “wait… This exists?”, You should click on those links.

stunned Mose

Mosey doesn’t know what to think of these websites, which is good. It means he isn’t seeking to trade me in for goats.

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Bird stalking (an Ode to Grumpy Cat)

People often tell me that I greatly resemble my father. I can see it in pictures but in personality it seems that I must have been dropped on his doorstep by some alien fostering program. I have some loose theories about glamour spells being used. Because my dad is like this:

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And I am like this
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In many ways I admire my dad. He is one of those people that never lost his enthusiasm. He has no shame in enjoying things.
For instance he likes birds. Like… more than any other person I have ever known. He knows all the birds and the specific sounds they make and keeps a list of which ones he sees on which days. He goes on trips to see birds he has not yet seen. He has a vest with many pockets (I am not clear on what it’s purpose is, but it has something to do with birds).
He uses the word “bird” as a verb. I have always considered it to be a noun, but apparently that is not always the case. With my dad one can go “birding”. It’s different than “bird watching” somehow because you actively go and find the birds. It could be accurately described as “bird stalking”.
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I personally try to respect the bird’s privacy. I don’t know what they think of my dad’s stalkerish devotion to them. Maybe they are flattered. It’s hard to say. I don’t speak bird.
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Really, I wish I could enjoy anything as much as my dad enjoys adding a magenta created warbler to his life list. I just don’t have it in me. Maybe I haven’t found the right hobby? Reading bad fan fiction on the Internet just doesn’t inspire the same kind of devotion. Or maybe I’m just a crabby bitch by nature.
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I hope that Moses inherits some of his grandfather’s enthusiasm. All signs point to yes.
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Guilty Pleasures

Everyone has little things that they do when they are having a bad day to cheer themselves up. For a normal person, I guess that might be watching a funny movie or drinking a nice cup of herbal tea.

But for me it’s much more shameful. In deep ugly corners of the internets lurks fan fiction. Usually Harry Potter fan fiction to be exact. Twisting the plot of one of my favorite book series into an unholy abomination of badness. It is creepy. It is wrong. It is hilarious.

I don’t know exactly when this started, but after learning that there were portmanteau couple names for pairings such as “Snarry” I knew I was hooked.

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I usually go in looking for the worst possible fan fic. Sometimes that can be challenging, as there are so many bad ones to chose from. Bad spelling, Purple prose, mixed metaphors, they’ve got it all.

There is a particularly we’ll known (amongst people who seek out bad Harry Potter fan fiction… It’s a thing) example is “My Immortal” By the (supposedly real?) Tara Gillespie. It is the story of Enoby Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way, a Hogwarts student in an alternate universe where all the main characters (excepting Snape/Snap/Snop/Snoop) are “Goffic”.

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Some quotes:

“I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT” Hagrid paused angrily “BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST”

“U C Enobby” Dumblydore said, watching the two of us watching the flame. “2 c wht iz n da flmes(HAHA YOU REVEIWRS FLAMES GEDDIT) u mst find urslf 1st, k?”

“Abra Kedavra!” he yelled at Snape and Loopin pointing his womb. I took my gun and shot Snape and Loopin a gazillion times and they both started screaming and the camera broke.”

Now how could anyone be sad or lonely when things like this exist in the world?

So yeah… Totally legit and not at all creepy thing for a 25 year old mother to spend her time reading right?

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